I would say it has been long since my last post. For quite all these time, I was pretty busy with university life and adaptation to the new environment. A lot of things have happened and I admit that I feel a lot better than the past few months, way much better. Perhaps it is because I met a lot of new friends and they are very nice to me. I realize that my heart is slowly starting to cure from the broken pieces, but it won't be form into a totally new one because the crack will always stay there.
Recently, I am feeling lost again that I somehow do not know what I am doing. I hate myself for being lost and can not control myself from doing something stupid. I felt guilty to accept a new love since I still miss him for somehow. I felt wrong for doing what I enjoy doing which I do not know if it is the right thing to do because I still care for him even though he has gone far. I am fooling with love and I really have no idea what I am doing these days. It is like a playing relationship, but not a serious one and I hate it.
Here I am again, crying digging my feeling out and express it in words. Now do I realize I miss him. I am always wondering if he has already move on, if he has already find someone to replace me. Although I wanted to see him happy with whoever is, I still feel heart broken inside. I will always remember you and I hope you would remember me too *tears dropping* :)
