Until today, It has been precisely a half year since you have left. I have struggled a lot through each day and wondered how you have been. Have you eaten more? Have you been very busy? Did you usually go to bed late? Are you happy? I want to know.
I have put all the blames to you alone and claimed that I was innocent. Although you hurt me from time to time, although you did not understand the way I am feeling, I wasn't that good of myself to you too and being selfish. I usually forced you to do things you did not like and whenever you didn't, I got mad and accused you for not loving me. I always thought that no matter what I do, whether I like it or not, as long as you are happy, I'm happy either. I just want you to understand how I am feeling. I thought you would feel the same way too but I was wrong.
I should have put myself in your shoes and understood the life situation you are dealing with. I should have been more considerate. I should have cuddled you after a hard day instead of making a fuss. I shouldn't have brought you so much troublesome. I shouldn't have bore you. This is what I supposed to do for someone I love with all my soul.
I guess I wasn't good enough to be a girl who could give you the kind of happiness you want. Even though you broke the promise you made for not leaving me, It doesn't matter anymore. I can endure it. I'm not that mad anymore because after all, I confess that I still care. So remember that whether you'll be with me or without me, please be happy :)
